Life is fickle.

It's true. Life is a fickle, fickle fiend.

An update: my mission has been postponed.

A few weeks ago, when a mission call should have been sent to me, a letter got sent to my stake president instead. There were a bit of health struggles a little while ago (I'm not dying!) and the brethren feel as though we need a bit more time to pass to make sure I can continue to be a successful, healthy little missionary before they send me half way around the world/country/state. I can reapply in May.

Surprised? A little. Disappointed? Yes. Sad? Definitely. Discouraged? No way.
I will still continue to prepare and plan for a mission! I just have eight more months to do it.

Thanks to all (Josh and Susan! ...and Nicole!) for the wonderful support and encouragement. This is not the end, merely a 'To Be Continued..."

Surprise.

For my one friend who reads this blog (thanks Josh), I have some rather exciting news! I have decided to serve a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. More exciting than that, my papers are in!! I started on Sunday, in by Wednesday. That has to be some kind of record...

But even though it sounds like it was a super fast, maybe even rash, decision, this is something I have been thinking and praying about for quite some time. Since I was a Beehive, I always wanted to be a missionary. Everyone told me I'd be married long before I would have the chance to go as a single sister. I half believed them, and they were almost right.

So much has happened in the past year; so much has changed, but my desire to serve a mission has remained a constant. Now that I have finally made my decision official, nothing has ever felt so right. I cannot remember a time that I have felt this peaceful, joyful, or complete. I have such a testimony of the restored gospel of Christ. I cannot wait to share His message with the people of Nebraska, Africa, or whatever place the Lord sends me.

So, surprise! Sorry I didn't tell anyone sooner, but if you really knew me, this probably doesn't seem like a surprise to you at all.

Be happy.

Why does everything seem to be so complicated lately? So confusing and unclear? There are so many things to think about, worry about, stress about, figure out... Where are the things to be happy about, excited about, laugh about, feel peace about? Answer? -They're here. Right here, wherever 'here' is. It doesn't matter if you are in Texas, Tennessee, or Turkey. The 'here' is wherever you are because it's inside you. You are the only thing standing in your way of being happy. Take a second to look around you. Chance are there is at least ONE thing that you can smile about. A favorite pair of jeans. Your 'feel good' music. Pictures. The green grass and trees outside your window. The warmth of the sun. No? What about your faith? Your beliefs. Your freedom. Your convictions, ambitions, and passions. What about the people around you? Your friends. Your family. The sweet old couple in the park. The stranger who smiles at you passing by.
Happiness is one thing that is not complicated. It's simple. It's a choice. Choose today to be happy. Take 10 minutes out of your busy, stressful, worrisome day to close your eyes, breathe, and think of all of the things that you have to be grateful for. Open your eyes, stretch your lips into a grin, and go face the rest of your day. Do it twice if you want- 5 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes at the end of the day. Or try it for 2 minutes five times a day. However you decide, get your 10 minutes in somewhere. Do this for seven days. At the end of the week, I dare you to even try to tell me you aren't happier.

Being happy does not rely on the situations that surround us. It comes from what we make of them.
"I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul."

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet.
-James Openheim

Where can I get one??

This little boy is the cutest thing on the planet.

Words of Wisdom.

Be careful who you give your heart to.

So,

so

careful.

Honest Scrap.

"First, list 10 honest things about yourself and second, pass this on to 7 bloggers who you feel embody the spirit of the Honest Scrap."

Disclaimer: I am only doing this for my sister, Whitney, because she passed it on to me...

10. If I was born a boy, I would be Michael Alexander Deer instead of Mikhael Alexandra Doe.
9. I'm not really a huge fan of germs...
8. I don't know when to quit.
7. I used to be the world's biggest perfectionist.
6. I love public speaking. I love forum debate.
5. I am a 'people-pleaser'.
4. I can't whistle or snap my fingers.
3. I rarely fall for anyone but when I do I fall hard.
2. I hate change. I hate letting go.
1. I have some of the greatest friends on the planet.

Freedom.

Ah, yes- the day has finally come... I'm free!! From classes, from finals, from BYU, and most importantly from the HBL library! For the next four hot, humid, relaxing, carefree, fun-filled, beautiful months, I am free. Oh, happy day!

I love the spring. I especially love the spring in Provo, Utah, and more specifically on BYU campus in Provo, Utah. People litter the grass like dandelions, all dressed in yellows and pinks, wearing shorts and sandals. It is a beautiful thing. Spring flings start to bloom and summer romance begins to fill the air. Smiles and laughs are exchanged warmly in the sunshine and blossoms from the trees speckle the sidewalks with color. Everyone seems to be glowing and emanating a spirit of cheerfulness. Parks are full of soccer balls, frisbees, and picnic blankets. Rooftops are occupied by sun bathers by day and blissful lovers by night. The fresh air is welcomed eagerly to swirl through open windows and doors. Contented sighs and giggles float up from the streets below... the perfect soundtrack to summer.

And what a better way to kick off summer vacation than with a cruise to Mexico with 80 of your closest friends! We'll be driving down on Friday to spend a day or two under the sunny Los Angeles sky until Sunday when we'll be Mexico bound. Don't worry, I'll post pictures ;)

This summer will be filled with tearful goodbyes, but also with long awaited hellos. It will be a summer of fun and family, of change and soul searching, but most of all- love.

Happy sunshine, everyone! Go outside and enjoy it!!